back from bandcamp
So it all turned out pretty awesome. I am officially a cliche.
Having come back from the screenwriting workshop at AFI in LA, I am cautiously optimistic that someday, I will be famous. Someday, I will be bald, and skinnier, with trendier glasses, and wear a permanently repulsed grimace -- I will be a successful writer. Odds, to be fair, are about 100,000 to 1 against me, and even if you sell a screenplay, the director usually cuts you from the project -- but there is a nice shady parasol of screenwriting if the air conditioned halls of PNAS expel me.
Things I learned:
1. One of my favorite movies, American Beauty, was never going to get made. Nobody in Hollywood wanted to invest in it, and it eventually took the ensemble of actors to get on board before any producer or studio was willing to make it. This is especially sad in light of the fact that my dream was to write that kind of true societal drama.
2. As encouragement, one of the folks teaching the workshop said that he had a friend who wrote 18 terrible screenplays, and finally made it big on his 19th. That big-selling, life-changing success was none other than "The Wedding Planner." And again, it hits me that it might take me more than 18 tries before I find my own personal version of JLo-esque depravity.
3. Ernest Hemingway once took the challenge to write the shortest story ever. I just thought it was clever. "For sale. Baby shoes. Never worn."
4. Whereas one producer liked my pitch for a screenplay, another kind of gave me a pity laugh. Granted, it's not the most uplifting idea for a movie, but when someone said, "What are you trying to do? A remake of Flowers for Algernon or Charlie?" I had no reply as I haven't read/seen either. Smug producer #2 responded with "yep -- that's the pedigree." And for the next several hours, I sat there in self-loathing. On a brighter note, he told me to call him in a week or two and pitch it to him again.
5. 2 Things that anyone in the business can't shut up about: (1) The "stakes" for your protagonist have to be high. That's why there are really only 3 types of drama on TV -- your cop drama, your legal drama, and your medical drama. And (2) Every screenplay can and should essentially boil down to mythology. After hearing the X-files guy go on and on about his show and how it's essentially a complex mythology, I've decided to start a little Joseph Campbell reading.
6. Everyone that spoke to us made it big by knowing the right people. Nobody graduated from college and got a job because they rocked. Someone knew Chris Carter, or some producer's brother, etc. As the world of science provides very little of this type of networking, I will officially be your slave if you have a successful hollywood producer in your family.
Enough of that -- boring. But the take home message is that I'm going to really give this screenwriting thing a shot. Well, that and be a grad student.
Having come back from the screenwriting workshop at AFI in LA, I am cautiously optimistic that someday, I will be famous. Someday, I will be bald, and skinnier, with trendier glasses, and wear a permanently repulsed grimace -- I will be a successful writer. Odds, to be fair, are about 100,000 to 1 against me, and even if you sell a screenplay, the director usually cuts you from the project -- but there is a nice shady parasol of screenwriting if the air conditioned halls of PNAS expel me.
Things I learned:
1. One of my favorite movies, American Beauty, was never going to get made. Nobody in Hollywood wanted to invest in it, and it eventually took the ensemble of actors to get on board before any producer or studio was willing to make it. This is especially sad in light of the fact that my dream was to write that kind of true societal drama.
2. As encouragement, one of the folks teaching the workshop said that he had a friend who wrote 18 terrible screenplays, and finally made it big on his 19th. That big-selling, life-changing success was none other than "The Wedding Planner." And again, it hits me that it might take me more than 18 tries before I find my own personal version of JLo-esque depravity.
3. Ernest Hemingway once took the challenge to write the shortest story ever. I just thought it was clever. "For sale. Baby shoes. Never worn."
4. Whereas one producer liked my pitch for a screenplay, another kind of gave me a pity laugh. Granted, it's not the most uplifting idea for a movie, but when someone said, "What are you trying to do? A remake of Flowers for Algernon or Charlie?" I had no reply as I haven't read/seen either. Smug producer #2 responded with "yep -- that's the pedigree." And for the next several hours, I sat there in self-loathing. On a brighter note, he told me to call him in a week or two and pitch it to him again.
5. 2 Things that anyone in the business can't shut up about: (1) The "stakes" for your protagonist have to be high. That's why there are really only 3 types of drama on TV -- your cop drama, your legal drama, and your medical drama. And (2) Every screenplay can and should essentially boil down to mythology. After hearing the X-files guy go on and on about his show and how it's essentially a complex mythology, I've decided to start a little Joseph Campbell reading.
6. Everyone that spoke to us made it big by knowing the right people. Nobody graduated from college and got a job because they rocked. Someone knew Chris Carter, or some producer's brother, etc. As the world of science provides very little of this type of networking, I will officially be your slave if you have a successful hollywood producer in your family.
Enough of that -- boring. But the take home message is that I'm going to really give this screenwriting thing a shot. Well, that and be a grad student.
posted by devdoot majumdar at 2:54 PM
2 Comments:
I did not know of this development for you Dev. Please accept my polite applause.
Your literary criticism experience reminded me of a story that author David Baldacci (guy who tends to write a 2 summer read novels a year and Absolute Power w/ Clint Eastwood, but I always find them very entertaining and loved the first bad guy he created) told a governor's school crowd:
In his early days, when he was sending novel drafts left and right, some "pro writing for dummies" book told him to attach a piece of paper to the front with a "check one" option for the reviewers. The options were "we are interested, call us; revise and try again in 6 months; go to hell". That way, one could quickly know where he stood and it would be easier for the publishers. Eventually he sent his first precious baby off. Most of the places didn't even return it, but the one that did checked their own box below the other three that said "we only represent talent"
Anyway, that sprung to mind. I also realized that the biggest hurdle you may have to face might be your own thin skin. Hell, we all can revel in being slammed by MIT Dancetroupe, MTG, or the SAAS (as my friend Tauhid does), but what will happen when trendy socialites scorn one of their own? The stakes will be bigger, and you can't just blow them off for a while or viciously retort without consequences. Still, I think you could develop a bit more of a shell as time goes on.
i think there was a compliment nestled in there somewhere, so thanks for that =).
but yes, i don't have the chops to handle some good old fashioned bashing by critics. that's what's great about being a critic -- people can't really retaliate without seeming like dumbasses for caring. it's like lambasting howard stern -- simple solution: don't listen.
but yes, I will fail, and the trick is really believing that, i suppose.
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